AlanAbar.com

“Life is not measured by
the number of breaths we take,
but by the moments
that take our breath away.”

…for some reason, Top Gun comes to mind.

I ran into a feq interesting quotes today, while reading. 

“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, therefore, is not an act but a habit.”
-Aristotle

“Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Willing is not enough; we must do.” -Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

The ability to concentrate and to use your time well is everything if you want to succeed in business–or almost anywhere else for that matter.
-Lee Iacocca

“There are four things YOU can do with a mistake: recognize it, admit it, learn from it, and change!“ 

For me, the best learning experiences have been when I have made mistakes, something went wrong, someone got mad, I have failed to deliver or meet an expectation I wasn’t aware about.  I love learning through books or being taught lessons, but as the saying goes…”Teach me, but I need to discover it for myself.”  Some of the best discoveries have been by mistake!

Recognize it!

When making mistakes (whether you agree it was a mistake or not) is to recognize the situation, the outcome of the behaviors / lack of behaviors, and what the impact was.  Sometimes we don’t realize we made a mistake, unless someone else mentions it.

When someone comes to you with what is perceived as a complaint, it’s easy to quickly defend yourself.  “No, it wasn’t my fault!”  Possibly start blaming someone else.

First understanding and recognizing the situation is key.

Admit It!

I find it very hard to admit mistakes, but it’s the 2nd necessary step to using mistakes as an opportunity for growth.  When you deny that there wasn’t anything you could have done, you automatically limit yourself from exploring new opportunities to grow and learn, and to expand your sense of creativity / endless solutions.

By first recognizing the mistake, and then admitting there was a mistake that could have been prevented, and that you could have done something about it…you start the right journey of discovery.

Learn from It

There is always a lesson to be learned from mistakes.  Value can always be extracted that can be used for the future.  They say that we should and can learn from the past.  Not only can we learn from our own mistakes, we should leverage lessons learned from other’s mistakes.  We just need to be willing to be open to new understanding.

Change!

Change is good.  Change is good when it’s for the better.  Through failure or mistakes, we can choose to continue with the same behavior or mentality, or choose to learn and change the way we proceed in the future.  Making mistakes is a great way to grow and learn, and to change ourselves into a better person than before.

I make mistakes all the time.  Sometimes it takes me a couple of iterations of mistakes before I finally understand the full extent of the mistake to extract the lesson.  But I try to following the following lesson:

“Recognize it!  Admit it!  Learn from it!  Change!”

Have you ever seen a great presenter in a meeting or training session and wondered, “How did they do that so well?” Here are some quick and easy tips to help with your presentation skills and keep your audience interested in your message:

Voice

• Strive for variety in your voice.     
• Change volume from forceful to soft.
• Change speed and tempo of speech. 
• Pause to breathe. This allows you to project your voice. 
• Use a lively and firm voice so you come across as authoritative and interesting.
• Avoid filler words such as “um,” “ah,” “OK,” etc.
• Put emphasis on the words you wish to stress.
• Enunciate your words for clarity of pronunciation.

 Gestures

• Use movement. Don’t stand in one place. Walk but avoid pacing.
• Don’t use a podium or be riveted to the spot where your notes are located.
• Move hands and arms when you speak.
• Avoid distracting the learners by jiggling change, clicking on a pen, waving a pointer, constant throat-clearing, pet phrases, swaying, etc.
• Use your personal mannerisms when speaking. Be yourself.

 Structure

• Start with an interesting statement, observation, quotation, or question.
• Use interesting examples, anecdotes, analogues, and statistics.
• Ask frequent questions.
• Don’t use lengthy notes. To be more spontaneous. Free yourself of notes as much as possible.

by Sarah Ban Breathnach

“Most of us are uncomfortable thinking of ourselves as artists…but each of us is an artist.  With every choice, every day, you are creating a unique work of art.  Something that only you can do.  The reason you were born was to leave your own indelible mark on the world. 

This is your authenticity.  Respect your creative urges…step out in faith…you will discover your choices are as authentic as you are.  What is more, you will discover that your life is all it was meant to be:  a joyous sonnet of thanksgiving.”

Lesson No.1

A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day.A small rabbit saw the crow, and asked him, “Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?” The crow answered: ” Sure, why not.” So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

Management Lesson: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.

Lesson No.2

A turkey was chatting with a bull. “I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree,” sighed the turkey, “but I haven’t got the energy.” “Well, why don’t you nibble on some of my droppings?” replied the bull. “They’re packed with nutrients.” The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first branch of the tree.The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fortnight, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon he was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.

Management Lesson: Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won’t keep you there.

Lesson No.3

When the body was first made, all the parts wanted to be Boss. The brain said, “I should be Boss because I control the whole body’s responses and functions.” The feet said, ” We should be Boss as we carry the brain about and get him to where he wants to go.” The hands said, “We should be the Boss because we do all the work and earn all the money.” And so it went on and on with the heart, the lungs and the eyes until finally the asshole spoke up. All the parts laughed at the idea of the asshole being the Boss. So the asshole went on strike, blocked itself up and refused to work. Within a short time the eyes became crossed, the hands clenched, the feet twitched, the heart and lungs began to panic and the brain fevered.Eventually they all decided that the asshole should be the Boss.

Management Lesson: You don’t need brains to be a Boss - any asshole will do.

Lesson No.4

A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold, the bird froze and fell to the ground in a large field. While it was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on it. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung,it began to realize how warm it was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him!

Management Lesson: 1) Not everyone who drops shit on you is your enemy. 2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend. 3) And when you’re in deep shit, keep your mouth shut!

Management is all about getting things done.  And you must also deliver continously!  Once a task is done, or an accomplishment is made, the next one should be ready to deliver as well.

Effective management is tied to your organization’s overall performance.  If your team does well, it contribuites to the organization’s success.  If the organization itself fails, then how effective the teams were, as well as how effective the management of this team are questionable.

Effective management can involve 2 main

• task accomplishments
• employee satisfaction

The effective manager is able to accomplish both simultaneously!

Taking risk is essential for you to understand your own capabilities, to reach your personal dreams.  It is scary, and some risks have huge rewards or extreme costs.

You can take risks, but with a bit of education and smartness, you can minimize the risk for the biggest return.  Knowing how to take a “calculated” risk to get ahead is a skill we all need to learn.

 They say the first step os to “Know what you want!”  You have understand yourself, know what makes you happy, what you want out of life.  It’s all about YOU! The risk you take is for your own benefit or loss.

A Few Advice on Risk Taking:

1. Don’t risk everything! - need to make sure you can still support yourself financially, emotionally, or physically
2. Ask for what you want!
3. Avoid unhealthy / dangerous risks! risks should be positive
4. Learn from Failures - we learn by making mistakes, but take the lessons learned to avoid bad decisions in the future
5. Start Right Away - the more practice you get, the easier taking risks will become
6. Don’t worry about what others think - it’s your life, and you make your own decisions.
7. If there’s nothing to lose, take the risk!  - sometimes the only thing holding you back is FEAR!

We all have to take risks in life, in order to reach our dreams.   Life goes by so fast, and time is precious!

Everyone will have to deal with negative people.  Here are some good tips when having to deal with negative employees:

1. Listen, Listen, Listen!

Sometimes people are consistently negative and repeat negative sentiments because they feel they have not been heard or understood.

By listening, asking questions to show interest, clarifying their statements, and actively listening to the person can help.

2. Decide if you believe the person for their reasons of negativity.

If you agree or disagree, ask if they want your advice, opinion, or help with their situation. 

Tell them your honest opinion if they are willing to take it.  If you think you’re just going to fuel the fire, back off!

3. Avoid Spending Time with the Person

Eventually if the person is just stubborn and not willing to change their negativity, you don’t need that to rub off on you or impact your positivity.

Avoid contributing to negative discussions, gossip, or story telling, as that only reinforces their thoughts as valid / ligitimate by your acceptance / acknowledgement.

4. Escalate if all Else Fails

If it gets to the point that the negativity is impacting the person’s performance and the performance of the team, it is time to escalate to the appropriate management / HR / supervisor of the behavior.

Maybe it’s time for the person to move on, and find a new place that will allow them to focus on their strengths and extract true performance, not fuel a negative side to their being.

Dealing with Negative people is not fun, but it happens all the time.  Listen, share your thoughts if welcome, avoid the negativity as much as possible, and escalate if absolutely necessary.

What’s the Difference? 

What is the difference between a “Manager” and a “Leaders”? This is a common question that is important to understand, when you’re put in a management / leadership type role.   They are not the same.   Knowing what each means is extremely important in becoming effective in your role.

Here are some key points I have learned through various readings, experiences, and feedback from managers and leaders alike.

• The Manager maintain the status quo, the Leader promotes change
• The Manager accepts the status quo, the Leader challenges it
• The Manager administers, the Leaders innovates
• The Manager is a copy, the Leader is an original
• The Manager focuses on systems and structure, the Leader focuses on people
• The Manager relies on control, the Leader inspires trust
• The Manager has a short-range view, the Leader has a long-range perspective
• The Manager ask how and when, the Leader asks what and why
• The Manager has their eyes on the bottom line, the Leader has theirs on the horizon
• The Manager imitates, the Leader originates
• The Manager is the classis good soldier, the Leader is his own person
• The Manager does things right, the Leader does the right things

I’ve learned as a manager, as well as an employee having a manager, that most people do not want to be managed, they want to be led!  If you want to manage someone, you have to be able to manage yourself.  You can’t lead someone if you cannot manage yourself. 

Management and leadership are both important, as leadership complements management, it doesn’t replace it. 

“Throughout life, we will be called to play many roles. Two of the most important work roles relate to that of leader and manager.”

“Some leaders cannot manage - some managers cannot lead”“You need a solid balance of both management and leadership skills to reach your greatest potential.”

“All the world’s a stage, And all the men and women merely players: They have their exits and their entrances; And one man in his time plays many parts.” — William Shakespeare  

Common Activities of Managers and Leaders

Management focus more on:

• Planning
• Organizing,
• Controlling
• Coordinating
• Directing
• Resource use
• Time management
• Logistics and the supply chain
• Finance and money management
• Budgeting
• Strategy
• Decision Making
• Problem Solving

Leader’s focus more on:

• Vision
• Inspiration
• Persuasion
• Motivation
• Relationships
• Team work
• Listening

One can add to the list activities such as:

• Counseling
• Coaching
• Teaching
• Mentoring